Christmas is for children…ALL children. But there are some kids in our community who can’t celebrate it as others do. They have special physical, mental and/or emotional needs that make attending public events difficult for them and their families. The lights, the crowds, the noise…the stairs, the leering, the comments…it’s enough to sap the joy out of any holiday. As a result, special needs families often feel left out this time of year. Not this Christmas, though, this is a very special Christmas for them.
A special Christmas
A dozen local families attended Habersham County’s first ever ‘Santa’s Special Workshop’ at the Cornelia Depot on Saturday. While other kids ran around and skated in Cornelia City Park on the hill just above them, these kids enjoyed a low-key, fun-filled evening with Santa Claus.
There were arts & crafts, magic, food, pictures with Santa, presents, lots of smiles and heartrending stories.
Special kids, special families
10-year old Mariana Nichols of Cornelia can’t talk or walk. She’s confined to a wheelchair and eats through a feeding tube. Mariana suffered brain damage at birth because, according to her mom, the doctors made a mistake. Imagining what Mariana’s life might have been like sometimes haunts her parents but they don’t dwell on it, their days are far too consumed with caring for their precious, precocious little girl.
Mariana has cerebral palsy, epilepsy and scoliosis. She has to have back surgery every six months and she requires around the clock care. Many marriages crumble beneath the weight of such responsibility but not the Nichols’. They say Mariana’s condition has brought them closer together as a couple and family.
Mariana, her 14-year old brother Mayson, mom Keila and dad Richard popped into Santa’s Special Workshop after Mayson’s 9th grade basketball game on Saturday. That was his event. This was hers. Dressed up in her orange Raider outfit Mariana’s eyes lit up as her dad gently placed her onto Santa’s lap. After a couple of photos her family joined in the picture. It was beautiful! Not just because of the smiles on everyone’s faces but because of the love, the compassion and commitment behind them.
“It means a lot to us to be able to come to a place where we feel welcomed, we feel accepted, where we know that everybody is not going to gawk at our kid and think, ‘Ooh, what’s wrong with them?,'”Keila says. “It’s nice to feel a sense of community. Even though we haven’t walked in the same shoes we can relate a little bit and that makes us all instant friends, instant family. I love coming to things like this knowing that my child was thought of, that she wasn’t forgotten.”
Teresa and John Adams of Clarkesville brought their 5-year old son London. London has ADHD, OCD and ODD (oppositional defiant disorder). It’s not easy to find public events where he fits in. “He can do a little more here than what he could if we took him to the mall or someplace like that,” John says. His wife agrees, “He’s accepted just for who he is and how he is.”
Saturday’s event was organized by Clarkesville resident Angel Gaddis. A single mother of three, Gaddis has a heart for the special needs community because she’s a part of it. Her 3-year old son Keegan has autism. “Since he was diagnosed I see a whole, bigger world of children who don’t always get involved,” Gaddis says. “For the most part they get left out and, whether they’re different or not, it’s not fair. They need this.”
So do their parents
Being the parent of a special needs child can be a lonely existence. It’s difficult for parents of children without special needs to relate. It also can be difficult to find and connect with other special needs families because oftentimes people don’t talk about it. Parents of special needs children have limited circles of support. They find that support wherever they can.
Jennifer and Timothy Barry drove down from Rabun County to Cornelia on Saturday with their two 4-year olds, Sophia and Kyle. Kyle is autistic. He’s been in therapy since he was 18-months old and was diagnosed with autism last year. The Barry’s made the drive to Habersham to attend Santa’s Special Workshop because they say there are no events like this where they live. “Just to get together and see the kids’ faces with Santa Claus, it just brings joy to the kids,” Jennifer says. “They have not stopped talking about Santa Claus all day long,” her husband chimes in. “Kyle couldn’t stop talking to him, telling him what he wanted for Christmas.”
The Barry’s say the event gave them the opportunity to meet other parents who face similar challenges with their children. They felt understood and accepted. Timothy Barry says that’s something he wishes would happen more often with the general public. “Not every autistic child is the same but not everybody needs to treat ’em like they’re some kind of diseased person or something either.”
“What I think people don’t understand is, they are here,” Keila says of special needs children. “Some parents unfortunately keep them at home because our community isn’t accessible as much as we think it is. So we’re needing the help of the community to provide resources for our children to be out in the community so that we can educate everyone about how normal, in a sense, regular, our kids are. They just need a little bit of extra help.”
Teresa Adams says events like the workshop are helpful because they’re more comfortable for the whole family. “Everyone’s extra warm and welcoming and you don’t get that ‘Why is your son crawling all over the so-and-so look.'”
Labor of love
That didn’t happen Saturday in the intimate setting of the old Cornelia train depot. There was no jostling in line. No getting antsy. Santa Claus took as much time as he needed with each child as local photographer Tony Rudeseal snapped away, capturing priceless memories for the children and their families. For him it truly was a labor of love. He volunteered his time and equipment. In fact, he did more than that. He changed his plans so he could be there after another photographer bowed out at the last minute.
Throughout his 35 years as a photographer Tony Rudeseal captured many special moments with special needs children in Habersham County. “It’s brought back a lot of memories for me,” he says, “They don’t know how special they are to me.” Asked why he gave up his Saturday to help out in Santa’s workshop Rudeseal simply replies, “Because I wanted to do it.”
That spirit of giving is what made the event super special. Not only that, it’s what made the event possible. Individual donors Wendy Hansen of Tennessee and Dave True provided presents and decorations, C & M Entertainment provided the music, local Boy Scouts entertained the kids and other volunteers helped decorate, cook and clean up.
God’s gift
Many would not consider the tubes and the wheelchairs, the outbursts and phobias to be blessings, but these parents say that they are. Life with a special needs child is a journey and they are learning and growing with their children along the way.
Timothy Barry says, “It just baffles me whenever parents find out that their child’s autistic that they want to act like it’s the end of the world and it’s really not. It’s the beginning of something very, very, beautiful – very beautiful – ’cause everyday’s a new experience and everyday’s something special.”
Richard Nichols says his heart melts every time his daughter smiles and her eyes light up as he walks into her room in the morning. He and his wife find beauty in simple moments others take for granted. “She is a non-verbal child so any time that I can see a little bit of her soul, a little bit of her thought process, it’s special to see,” Keila Nichols says with tears welling up in her eyes.
Even Santa, who is every child’s best friend, says these kids are extra special to him. He left his workshop at the North Pole to visit his special workshop in Cornelia. “I made time because these kids are special and they need to have some time with Santa. You know, they don’t always get one on one attention with me so I made myself available just for that.”
Gaddis plans to make Santa’s Special Workshop an annual event. “I hope to be able to do it every year and for it to grow and become a yearly tradition that families can look forward to and get excited about.” The big man in red supports that. He looks at the children and says, “Oh, they’re special, they’re very special. They’re just perfect – God’s gift to us.”
And with that Santa Claus gently hoists another child onto his lap, listens to their wishes and heaves a hearty HO, HO.
More special memories from Santa’s Special Workshop on December 20, 2014, in Cornelia.
