It is inevitable, at some point in our lives we question God. We wonder what He could possibly be doing because what we planned isn’t working out. The reality of it all is, we will never understand who God is; what He thinks; how He works; or when He came into being. If we did, He wouldn’t be God. If we could figure Him out, He wouldn’t be who He is.
When I was a little girl, I decided I want to be a missionary to the USSR. The thought consumed me. In my child-like manner, I had a plan to spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ to those who lived behind the Iron Curtain. I actually thought it was a curtain, and I could possibly crawl under it. My teacher assigned an essay for us to write, “What I want to be when I grow-up.” The entire night after dinner and chores were done, I spent composing my plan to witness to the people of the USSR. The next day I read my paper with such enthusiasm and energy, only to hear the words of my teacher, “It is not a good idea, Nora. It is impossible for you to be a missionary in communist Russia. People in the United States will never go to Russia. There are plenty of people here in the United States who need to love Christ. Focus on them.”
I remember crying out to God as young as I was asking Him why I wouldn’t be a missionary in Russia. My grandmother read me Isaiah 55:8-9, “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the LORD. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.'” She closed her Bible and smiled, “If God wants you in Russia, He’ll send you to Russia. He knows things we could never fully understand.”
Some 20 years after I read my essay in class, “What I want to be when I grow up,” my plane landed in Moscow. Some 20 years after my teacher told me I’d never go, I stood in line waiting to have my Visa and passport stamped. Some 20 years after my grandmother told me if God wanted me there…, I walked through the airport and out into the streets of Moscow. I ended up working in humanitarian aid and adoption for 11 years in Russia. I was given the privilege of witnessing to many people about Jesus Christ, and some 150 kids found homes in the United States.
It wasn’t as I planned. It wasn’t as other people claimed it to be either. But God put a passion in my heart at the age of 8, and He never let it die.
Some of you may be waiting on God, wondering if He has forgotten you, wishing to fulfill the dreams of your heart. “His ways are not our ways. His thoughts are not our thoughts.” Some of you may be struggling with life and trying to understand why you are going through what you are going through. Know that God is very present. He hasn’t forgotten you. Trust Him to see you through it.
